The truth that many people never understand, until it is too late, is that the more you try to avoid suffering the more you suffer because smaller and more insignificant things begin to torture you in proportion to your fear of being hurt. (Thomas Merton).
What is fear?
There is fear which is a natural instinct related to true danger (like being chased by a tiger) and then there is fear that can start to control your everyday life. You may think to yourself, well I don’t live in fear but when we stop to feel into that & give it the space it needs to be recognised it may just surprise you.
When we live in fear on a daily basis in can affect the way we see & do everything. Some of the things we may fear could be:
· Living in fear of something happening to those we love.
· Fear of losing our loved ones.
· Fear of death itself.
· Fear of not living up to other people’s expectations.
· Fear of our marriage or relationships failing.
· Fear of being vulnerable & letting others see the “real you”.
· Fear of things not being perfect in our own eyes or in the eyes of others.
There are so many different ways fear can present itself. Here is the key to recognising what you may be holding onto fear around.
Ask yourself what it is you are trying to control or what it is you are withdrawing from?
You see, the only reason we need to control what is happening around us is when we are coming from a place of fear. If we don't try to control what is happening in order to try and make ourselves feel safe, we often withdraw in an attempt not to feel the fear. The problem with this is that it creates an imbalance in our bodies and can lead to anxiety, overthinking and even paranoia.
When we talk about fear and the 5 elements we look at the water element. When there is an imbalance in the water element related to fear it can effect the kidney and bladder meridians (energy lines).
This water imbalance means that you can never truly relax and be at rest because you are always trying to think your way to safety. You are forever alert & vigilant from the inside. This constant vigilance is what produces anxiety & overthinking.
The greater the sense of fear the more we drive ourselves in order to create the environment we want. Often keeping ourselves very busy in order to distract ourselves from our fear.
When there are imbalances or blockages in these meridians it can also show itself physically in the form of dry hair and hair loss, fragile bones, dry tongue & mouth, hearing problems, bladder problems, cold feet, imbalances in body temperature, discomfort in the lumbar region and small joints. Women can sometimes experience menstrual problems and miscarriages. Men can experience infertility and sexual problems.
The lesson that needs to be learnt when we are working with fear is that we can only feel safe when we trust our innate wisdom. It is the only thing that provides a true sense of danger and safety. This wisdom also allows us to flow with life instead of against it. When we flow with life we tend to adopt a middle way, not reaching out impatiently for what we desire but instead working step by step in the right direction. Each moment in life can then we treasured instead of being seen as just a moment in life on the way to a particular goal or outcome.
If you feel that you can relate to this or you are experiencing any of these symptoms, would like to be able to connect with your innate wisdom, work on clearing blockages in these meridians and your body, please contact me. Fear does not need to control your life.
Kim Cameron - Holistic Kinesiologist & Mind Body Medicine Practitioner
Phone - 0402108746